What Your Closet Is Trying to Tell You

I get asked all the time how chaotic my closet must be, and honestly? It isn’t. I share a closet with my husband and only have half of it. What I do have is intention. Over the years, I’ve learned what works, what doesn’t, and I’ve built a system that actually supports my real life. And, I’m breaking it down using the exact method I use in this post.

This isn’t Swedish Death Cleaning. There’s no pressure to purge your entire identity in one afternoon. These are small, manageable shifts that will change the way you see your closet, your style, and the way you get dressed every day. I'm all about sustainable change, and to me, dumping every last thing out of my closet and onto my bed is an immediate heck no. Besides, who has the time for a project like that nowadays? 

I’ve learned my style inside and out. I know what flatters my body, what I’ll never reach for, and what’s simply a flash-in-the-pan trend. I know when to skip something—and when to sprinkle in a fun, trendy piece to keep my wardrobe feeling fresh and cohesive. And I promise, this is a skill you can learn too. (Stay tuned for more blogs this winter, diving into all of these topics!)

But let’s be clear—this isn’t a cute little checklist. This is an honest inventory. It’s skill-building. It’s self-reflection. It asks you to take a real look at your lifestyle, your comfort level, and who you actually are—not who you think you should be. It’s psychological. It’s a little deep. And it requires honesty.

So if you’re looking for a quick “clean your closet in 30 minutes” list or a Pinterest-worthy closet- this ain’t it. If you’re ready to build a closet that works for you, reduces decision fatigue, and makes getting dressed feel easier and more confident—let’s get into it.

Step One: Declutter & Purge

Before you can organize, you have to clear the mental and physical noise. Decluttering isn’t just about making space—it’s about reducing overwhelm. Our brains crave clarity, and when your closet is packed with too many choices, it makes getting dressed harder, not easier.

Lots of blogs and checklists will tell you take EVERYTHING out of your closet, but I firmly disagree. Doing this causes me great personal panic and overwhelm, so I prefer a gentler approach. And who really has a weekend to do this? The thought of my bed stacked high with every piece of clothing I own makes me want to immediately run away. Instead, I start in small, bite-sized sections. I have a wicker basket under a table in my closet that always becomes a catch-all for me, so I like to start there.  We all have that 'corner of shame' or section of your closet that is the low-hanging fruit to start with.

As you go, sort pieces into three simple piles: Keep, Donate/Toss, and Decide Later.

Some items will be obvious. Others will make you pause—and that’s completely normal. We attach memories, “what if” scenarios, and future versions of ourselves to our clothes. That hesitation doesn’t mean you’re bad at decluttering; it means it's time to take a good look at WHY it came home with you and WHY it isn't working. We’ll come back to that Decide Later pile and gently unpack what’s really keeping those pieces in your closet.

Step Two: Categorize & Sort

This step isn’t about making your closet look cute for Instagram.
It’s about use and utility.

Organize your closet for the life you’re actually living—not the one you’re saving clothes for “just in case.” Think about flow. The things you grab most often should be the easiest to reach. Simple as that.

Ask yourself:
What do I wear on a regular, normal, nothing-special Tuesday?

That answer tells you everything.

Put the Workhorses Front and Center

Group like with like—jeans with jeans, cozy tops together, layers in one spot.

Then give the best space to what you actually wear:

• Live in cozy clothes? They go front and center.

• Head to the office every day? Workwear gets prime real estate.

• Saving outfits for a someday life? Tote em' up. Kindly. And move on.

Your closet does not need to hold space for guilt. 

Not Everything Deserves a Hanger

Hanging space is premium real estate. If something is hanging that you never reach for, it’s freeloading. Fold it. Store it. Let something useful take its place.

Less clutter = fewer outfit meltdowns.

Function > Pretty

Color-coding is cute. It’s very Pinterest. It photographs beautifully.
But unless you’re preparing for the Tour of Homes, I genuinely do not care if your closet is color-coordinated—if it doesn’t actually work for your life.

Function wins. Every time.

This is where I want you to get honest about your habits. Think about how you actually get dressed in the morning:

• Do you start by looking for a color?

• Or do you shop by item—jeans first, then a top, then a layer?

There’s no right answer here. The right answer is yours.

Extra credit moment: this is exactly why I hate one-size-fits-all closet clean-out checklists. They tell you what to do without ever asking how you think, move, or feel when you get dressed. They ignore behavior. They ignore real life.

Your closet should be organized around how you shop it, not how someone else says it should look.

Pretty is optional.
Useful is not.

Step Three: Tackle the “Decide Later” Pile

Ah yes. The pile where good intentions go to die.

Most of these pieces ended up here for one of four reasons:

1. We bought them for the girl we want to be

2. Someone told us we “needed” this capsule piece

3. It was on clearance, and we blacked out

4. It’s missing one crucial thing to actually work

Let’s talk about the first two—because they’re the biggest liars.

(Me in the off-the-shoulder top I swore would carry my entire date-night identity. Stunning. Classic. Expensive. Worn three times—because strapless bras and toddlers do not coexist. Ever.)

The Girl You Thought You’d Be

When I worked at Stitch Fix, I tried on everything. Every aesthetic. Every fantasy version of myself. It was fun… until it wasn’t.

Suddenly, I had a closet full of sparkly date-night tops for a woman who was not, in fact, going on date nights. The last fancy date I went on with my husband was two presidents ago.

Some of those pieces were expensive, so I kept them. Out of guilt. They hung there, front and center, judging me—while I reached past them every day for my cozy matching sets.

Tell me how that was helping me.

Those clothes weren’t aspirational. They were just a daily reminder that my closet didn’t match my life.

So I asked the hard question:
What part of me did I think I was buying for?

Now you see why this process is like therapy? I'm asking you to slowly, over the course of a few weeks, go through that pile and figure out the WHY behind why it came home with you.

What part of yourself did you want to be when you purchased that? Some of the pieces will be hard truths. I wanted to be the stylish city girl who went on fancy dates all the time. But my life wasn't that, and that wasn't the season of my life. So, I got rid of some, packed some into a clear bin at the top of my closet, and made way for those adorable matching sets- front and center. I'm able to step into my closet with who I am in this moment, right now, and be greeted with actual options of what works for my life.

And wow. What a relief.

 

Side quest: The “Capsule Piece” Myth

Let me save you some time.

I always wanted to be the classic white button-up girl. You know the one. Timeless. Chic. On every capsule checklist ever written (which—side note—I hate).

I bought one. Didn’t work.
Bought another. Still didn’t work.
Naturally, I kept buying more.

Because obviously that was the solution. 

I needed to stop the madness and figure out why this style didn't work for me. Personal analysis time: I was a stay-at-home mom who rarely got dressed up, trying to rock a fitted white button-up shirt with a larger bust. I'm sure as you're reading this, you're able to diagnose where I was going wrong, but truthfully, in the moment, I could not see it.

I needed a different style to work for the body I actually had. Not the body I wanted or hoped one day I could be. I could keep buying clothes for this idealized version of Cass, or I could take a step back and look at what specifically needed to be altered to make this style work for present me.

I started with a more oversized fit to accommodate my bust. Then, I swapped the stark white (hello stains, yellowing, and too sheer fabric that showed my bra), and went with a subtle stripe that could hide all of that. And guess what? I now wear the ever-living-daylights out of a striped blouse, and it's my go-to chic piece when I want to feel like a baddie.

THIS is the real work you need to do in your wardrobe and will fundamentally change the way you see your closet. It'll change the way you shop to be more intentional and mindful, it will help you take joy in your closet, and help you feel empowered and confident when you get dressed in the morning. This is the secret sauce, my friends.

If something in your “decide later” pile doesn’t work, it’s not because you failed.

It either:

• Belongs to a version of you you’re not living right now

• Needs a small adjustment

• Or just isn’t your piece

When you stop forcing clothes to work, everything gets easier. 

Lastly...

If you’re reading this thinking, “Okay… but I still don’t know why some of my clothes just don’t work,” you’re not failing. That’s literally the part my team and I are trained to help with.

At Thread & Clover, we’re really good at spotting why something isn’t clicking on your body or in your life—and what to swap it for instead. Maybe that date-night top isn’t wrong, it’s just too fussy, and what you actually needed was a washable black top you can wear a dozen different ways. Maybe that white button-up isn’t bad—it’s just too fitted, and your body needs a different cut. Maybe those jeans aren’t working because mid-rise sounded right… but your body is begging for a higher rise with a little tummy control.

Still with me? Or did that start sounding like Greek?

Either way—don’t overthink it. Just come into the shop.

My team and I have your back. We’ll help you filter the noise, figure out what actually works, and build a wardrobe that supports your real life—not the imaginary one.

Happy closet cleaning… and when you’re ready, we’ll be here

 

XO,

Cass